Quotes4study

Christmas time is here, by Golly;    Kill the turkeys, ducks and chickens;

Disapproval would be folly;        Mix the punch, drag out the Dickens;

Deck the halls with hunks of holly;    Even though the prospect sickens,

Fill the cup and don't say when...    Brother, here we go again.

On Christmas day, you can't get sore;    Relations sparing no expense'll,

Your fellow man you must adore;        Send some useless old utensil,

There's time to rob him all the more,    Or a matching pen and pencil,

The other three hundred and sixty-four!    Just the thing I need... how nice.

It doesn't matter how sincere        Hark The Herald-Tribune sings,

It is, nor how heartfelt the spirit;    Advertising wondrous things.

Sentiment will not endear it;        God Rest Ye Merry Merchants,

What's important is... the price.    May you make the Yuletide pay.

                    Angels We Have Heard On High,

Let the raucous sleighbells jingle;    Tell us to go out and buy.

Hail our dear old friend, Kris Kringle,    Sooooo...

Driving his reindeer across the sky,

Don't stand underneath when they fly by!

        -- Tom Lehrer

Fortune Cookie

'Twas the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period

   preceding the annual Yuletide celebration, And

   throughout our place of residence,

Kinetic activity was not in evidence among the

   possessors of this potential, including that

   species of domestic rodent known as Mus musculus.

Hosiery was meticulously suspended from the forward

   edge of the woodburning caloric apparatus,

Pursuant to our anticipatory pleasure regarding an

   imminent visitation from an eccentric

   philanthropist among whose folkloric appelations

   is the honorific title of St. Nicklaus ...

Fortune Cookie

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