There's nothing worse for your business than extra Santa Clauses
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world. You tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding. No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.
FORTUNE DISCUSSES THE OBSCURE FILMS: #3 MIRACLE ON 42ND STREET: Santa Claus, in the off season, follows his heart's desire and tries to make it big on Broadway. Santa sings and dances his way into your heart.
In the middle of a wide field is a pot of gold. 100 feet to the north stands a smart manager. 100 feet to the south stands a dumb manager. 100 feet to the east is the Easter Bunny, and 100 feet to the west is Santa Claus. Q: Who gets to the pot of gold first? A: The dumb manager. All the rest are myths.
<dhd> is there a special christmas pack for quake <dhd> where you get to be like the santa robot on futurama? <dunham> dhd: that would be a rather unbalanced game... <Knghtbrd> dunham: that's the idea. ;>
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. -- Shirley Temple
There's nothing worse for your business than extra Santa Clauses smoking in the men's room. -- W. Bossert
... He scrubs the POPE with a mild soap or detergent for 15 minutes,
starring JANE FONDA!!
"Daddy, Daddy, make Santa Claus go away!" "I can't, son; he's grown too powerful." "HO HO HO!" -- Duck's Breath Mystery Theatre
A little kid went up to Santa and asked him, "Santa, you know when I'm bad right?" And Santa says, "Yes, I do." The little kid then asks, "And you know when I'm sleeping?" To which Santa replies, "Every minute." So the little kid then says, "Well, if you know when I'm bad and when I'm good, then how come you don't know what I want for Christmas?"
So, you better watch out! You better not cry! You better not pout! I'm telling you why,
He knows when you've been sleeping,
He know when you're awake.
He knows if you've been bad or good,
He has ties with the CIA.
So...
better !pout !cry better watchout lpr why santa claus < north pole > town cat /etc/passwd > list ncheck list ncheck list cat list | grep naughty > nogiftlist cat list | grep nice > giftlist santa claus < north pole > town who | grep sleeping who | grep awake who | grep bad || good for (goodness sake) { be good }
Progress, far from consisting in change, depends on retentiveness. When change is absolute there remains no being to improve and no direction is set for possible improvement: and when experience is not retained, as among savages, infancy is perpetual. Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
Fanaticism consists in redoubling your effort when you have forgotten your aim.
But the duke's soldiers, not being content with having pillaged the men of Oliverotto, began to sack Sinigalia, and if the duke had not repressed this outrage by killing some of them they would have completely sacked it. Night having come and the tumult being silenced, the duke prepared to kill Vitellozzo and Oliverotto; he led them into a room and caused them to be strangled. Neither of them used words in keeping with their past lives: Vitellozzo prayed that he might ask of the pope full pardon for his sins; Oliverotto cringed and laid the blame for all injuries against the duke on Vitellozzo. Pagolo and the Duke di Gravina Orsini were kept alive until the duke heard from Rome that the pope had taken the Cardinal Orsino, the Archbishop of Florence, and Messer Jacopo da Santa Croce. After which news, on 18th January 1502, in the castle of Pieve, they also were strangled in the same way.
What renders man an imaginative and moral being is that in society he gives new aims to his life which could not have existed in solitude: the aims of friendship, religion, science, and art.
The God to whom depth in philosophy bring back men’s minds is far from being the same from whom a little philosophy estranges them.
"That's true, that's true--yes, both true enough. But you must jump when he gives an order. Step and growl; growl and go--that's the word with Captain Ahab. But nothing about that thing that happened to him off Cape Horn, long ago, when he lay like dead for three days and nights; nothing about that deadly skrimmage with the Spaniard afore the altar in Santa?--heard nothing about that, eh? Nothing about the silver calabash he spat into? And nothing about his losing his leg last voyage, according to the prophecy. Didn't ye hear a word about them matters and something more, eh? No, I don't think ye did; how could ye? Who knows it? Not all Nantucket, I guess. But hows'ever, mayhap, ye've heard tell about the leg, and how he lost it; aye, ye have heard of that, I dare say. Oh yes, THAT every one knows a'most--I mean they know he's only one leg; and that a parmacetti took the other off."
The earth has music for those who listen.
During my researches in the Leviathanic histories, I stumbled upon an ancient Dutch volume, which, by the musty whaling smell of it, I knew must be about whalers. The title was, "Dan Coopman," wherefore I concluded that this must be the invaluable memoirs of some Amsterdam cooper in the fishery, as every whale ship must carry its cooper. I was reinforced in this opinion by seeing that it was the production of one "Fitz Swackhammer." But my friend Dr. Snodhead, a very learned man, professor of Low Dutch and High German in the college of Santa Claus and St. Pott's, to whom I handed the work for translation, giving him a box of sperm candles for his trouble--this same Dr. Snodhead, so soon as he spied the book, assured me that "Dan Coopman" did not mean "The Cooper," but "The Merchant." In short, this ancient and learned Low Dutch book treated of the commerce of Holland; and, among other subjects, contained a very interesting account of its whale fishery. And in this chapter it was, headed, "Smeer," or "Fat," that I found a long detailed list of the outfits for the larders and cellars of 180 sail of Dutch whalemen; from which list, as translated by Dr. Snodhead, I transcribe the following:
The voyage of Drake across the Pacific was preceded by that of Alvaro de Mendaña, who was despatched from Peru in 1567 to discover the great Antarctic continent which was believed to extend far northward into the South sea, the search for which now became one of the leading motives of exploration. After a voyage of eighty days across the Pacific, Mendaña discovered the Solomon Islands; and the expedition returned in safety to Callao. The appearance of Drake on the Peruvian coast led to an expedition being fitted out at Callao, to go in chase of him, under the command of Pedro Sarmiento. He sailed from Callao in October 1579, and made a careful survey of the Strait of Magellan, with the object of fortifying that entrance to the South sea. The colony which he afterwards took out from Spain was a complete failure, and is only remembered now from the name of "Port Famine," which Cavendish gave to the site at which he found the starving remnant of Sarmiento's settlers. In June 1595 Mendaña sailed from the coast of Peru in command of a second expedition to colonize the Solomon Islands. After discovering the Marquesas, he reached the island of Santa Cruz of evil memory, where he and many of the settlers died. His young widow took command of the survivors and brought them safely to Manila. The viceroys of Peru still persevered in their attempts to plant a colony in the hypothetical southern continent. Pedro Fernandez de Quiros, who was pilot under Mendaña and Luis Vaez de Torres, were sent in command of two ships to continue the work of exploration. They sailed from Callao in December 1605, and discovered several islands of the New Hebrides group. They anchored in a bay of a large island which Quiros named "Australia del Espiritu Santo." From this place Quiros returned to America, but Torres continued the voyage, passed through the strait between Australia and New Guinea which bears his name, and explored and mapped the southern and eastern coasts of New Guinea. Entry: PROGRESS
A very remarkable Santa Cruz armadillo, _Peltephilus_, has an altogether peculiar type of head-shield, developed into horns in front of the eyes; and, what is still more noteworthy, teeth in the front of the jaws, thereby rendering the ordinary definition of the order Edentata incorrect. It has been made the type of a distinct family, _Peltephilidae_. Entry: A
CALAHORRA (anc. _Calagurris_), a city of northern Spain, in the province of Logroño; on the left bank of the river Cidacos, which enters the Ebro 3 m. E., and on the Bilbao-Saragossa railway. Pop. (1900) 9475. Calahorra is built on the slope of a hill overlooking the wide Ebro valley, which supplies its markets with an abundance of grain, wine, oil and flax. Its cathedral, which probably dates from the foundation of the see of Calahorra in the 5th century, was restored in 1485, and subsequently so much altered that little of the original Gothic structure survives. The Casa Santa, annually visited by many thousands of pilgrims on the 31st of August, is said to contain the bodies of the martyrs Emeterius and Celedonius, who were beheaded in the 3rd or 4th century, on the site now occupied by the cathedral. Their heads, according to local legend, were cast into the Ebro, and, after floating out to sea and rounding the Iberian peninsula, are now preserved at Santander. Entry: CALAHORRA
EL PASO, a city, port of entry, and the county-seat of El Paso county, Texas, U.S.A., on the E. bank of the Rio Grande, in the extreme W. part of the state, at an altitude of 3710 ft. Pop. (1880) 736; (1890) 10,338; (1900) 15,906, of whom 6309 were foreign-born and 466 were negroes; (1910 census) 39,279. Many of the inhabitants are of Mexican descent. El Paso is an important railway centre and is served by the following railways: the Atchison, Topeka & Santa Fé, of which it is the S. terminus; the El Paso & South-Western, which connects with the Chicago, Rock Island & El Paso (of the Rock Island system); the Galveston, Harrisburg & San Antonio, of which it is the W. terminus; the Mexican Central, of which it is the N. terminus; the Texas & Pacific, of which it is the W. terminus; a branch of the Southern Pacific, of which it is the E. terminus; and the short Rio Grande, Sierra Madre & Pacific, of which it is the N. terminus. The city is regularly laid out on level bottom lands, stretching to the table-lands and slopes to the N.E. and N.W. of the city. Opposite, on the W. bank of the river, is the Mexican town of Ciudad Juarez (until 1885 known as Paso del Norte), with which El Paso is connected by bridges and by electric railway. The climate is mild, warm and dry, El Paso being well known as a health resort, particularly for sufferers from pulmonary complaints. Among the city's public buildings are a handsome Federal building, a county court house, a city hall, a Y.M.C.A. building, a public library, a sanatorium for consumptives, and the Hotel Dieu, a hospital maintained by Roman Catholics. El Paso is the seat of St Joseph's Academy and of the El Paso Military Institute. Three miles E. of the city limits is Fort Bliss, a U.S. military post, with a reservation of about 2 sq. m. El Paso's situation on the Mexican frontier gives it a large trade with Mexico; it is the port of entry of the Paso del Norte customs district, one of the larger Mexican border districts, and in 1908 its imports were valued at $2,677,784 and its exports at $5,661,901. Wheat, boots and shoes, mining machinery, cement, lime, lumber, beer, and denatured alcohol are among the varied exports; the principal imports are ore, sugar, cigars, oranges, drawn work and Mexican curios. El Paso has extensive manufactories, especially railway car shops, which in 1905 employed 34.5% of the factory wage-earners. Just outside the city limits are important lead smelting works, to which are brought ores for treatment from western Texas, northern Mexico, New Mexico and Arizona. Among the city's manufactures are cement, denatured alcohol, ether, varnish, clothing and canned goods. The value of the city's total factory product in 1905 was $2,377,813, 96% greater than that in 1900. El Paso lies in a fertile agricultural valley, and in 1908 the erection of an immense dam was begun near Engle, New Mexico (100 m. above El Paso), by the U.S. government, to store the flood waters of the Rio Grande for irrigating this area. Before the Mexican War, following which the first United States settlement was made, the site of El Paso was known as Ponce de Leon Ranch, the land being owned by the Ponce de Leon family. El Paso was first chartered as a city in 1873, and in 1907 adopted the commission form of government. Entry: EL
The following four MSS. may be noticed: (1) "Corpus," i.e. Corpus Christi College, Cambridge, No. 181; (2) "Petau," i.e. Leiden University, 77 (formerly 104)--both these are certainly earlier than 1300; (3) "Colbert," i.e. Paris, National Library, Fonds Lat. 2477, of about 1350; (4) "London-Lumley," i.e. London, British Museum, MSS. Reg. 13 A xiv., of late 13th century. Three other MSS. certainly exist; yet six more are perhaps to be found, but none of these possesses the value of those given above. Besides the editions referred to in the body of the article, we may also mention (1) P. Girolamo Golubovich, _Biblioteca bio-bibliografica della Terra Santa e dell' Oriente Francescano_ (1906), vol. i. (1215-1300), pp. 190-213; (2) _William of Rubruck ... with ... John of Pian de Carpine_, edited by W.W. Rockhill, Hakluyt Society (1900), especially pp. 1-39; (3) C. Raymond Beazley, _Dawn of Modern Geography_, ii. (1901), 279-317, 375-380; in. 85, 544, 553; and _Carpini and Rubruquis_, Hakluyt Society (1903), especially pp. vii.-xviii. 43-144, 249-295. (H. Y.; C. R. B.) Entry: CARPINI
The western and larger part of Tierra del Fuego (q.v.) belongs to Chile. About 63 m. S.W. of Cape Horn, in lat. 56° 25' S., is the Diego Ramirez group of small, rocky islands, the most southern possession of the republic. Its westernmost possessions are Sala-y-Gomez and Easter islands, the former in about 27° S., 105° W., and the latter, the easternmost inhabited Polynesian island, in 27° 6' S., 109° 17' W. Much nearer the Chilean coast (396 m.), lying between the 33rd and 34th parallels, are the three islands of the Juan Fernandez group, and rising apparently from the same submerged plateau about 500 m. farther north of the latter are the rocky islets of San Ambrosio and San Felix, all belonging to Chile. North of Chiloé there are few islands in close proximity to the coast. The more important of these are La Mocha, off the southern coast of Arauco, in lat. 38° 20' S., which is 8 m. long and rises to an elevation of 1240 ft. above the sea; Santa Maria, 30 m. south-west of Concepcion, which partially encloses the Bay of Arauco and is well cultivated; and Quiriquina, lying off the port of Talcahuano in the entrance to Concepción bay. There are a few barren islands on the desert coast, the largest of which are between Coquimbo and Caldera. Since the removal of their guano deposits they have become practically worthless, except where they serve to shelter anchorages. Entry: CHILE
_Natural Products._---For more than two centuries British Honduras has been supported by its trade in timber, especially in mahogany, logwood, cedar and other dye-woods and cabinet-woods, such as lignum-vitae, fustic, bullet-wood, santa-maria, ironwood, rosewood, &c. The coloured inhabitants are unsurpassed as woodmen, and averse from agriculture; so that there are only about 90 sq. m. of tilled land. Sugar-cane, bananas, cocoanut-palms, plantains, and various other fruits are cultivated; vanilla, sarsaparilla, sapodilla or chewing-gum, rubber, and the cahoon or coyol palm, valuable for its oil, grow wild in large quantities. In September 1903 all the pine trees on crown lands were sold to Mr B. Chipley, a citizen of the United States, at one cent (½ d.) per tree; the object of the sale being to secure the opening up of undeveloped territory. Unsuccessful attempts have been made to establish sponge fisheries on a large scale. Entry: BRITISH
GUTHRIE, the capital of Oklahoma, U.S.A., and the county-seat of Logan county, extending on both sides of Cottonwood creek, and lying one mile south of the Cimarron river. Pop. (1890) 5333, (1900) 10,006, (1907) 11,652 (2871 negroes); (1910) 11,654. It is served by the Atchison, Topeka & Santa Fé, the Chicago, Rock Island & Pacific, the Missouri, Kansas & Texas, the Fort Smith & Western, and the St Louis, El Reno & Western railways. The city is situated about 940 ft. above the sea, in a prairie region devoted largely to stock-raising and the cultivation of Indian corn, wheat, cotton and various fruits, particularly peaches. Guthrie is one of the headquarters of the Federal courts in the state, the other being Muskogee. The principal public buildings at Guthrie are the state Capitol, the Federal building, the City hall, the Carnegie library, the Methodist hospital and a large Masonic temple. Among the schools are St Joseph's Academy and a state school for the deaf and dumb. Guthrie has a considerable trade with the surrounding country and has cotton gins, a cotton compress, and foundries and machine shops; among its manufactures are cotton-seed oil, cotton goods, flour, cereals, lumber, cigars, brooms and furniture. The total value of the factory product in 1905 was $1,200,662. The municipality owns and operates the waterworks. The city was founded in 1889, when Oklahoma was opened for settlement; in 1890 it was made the capital of the Territory, and in 1907 when Oklahoma was made a state, it became the state capital. Entry: GUTHRIE
There is no cure for birth and death other than to enjoy the interval. -- George Santayana</p>
_Mosaics and Paintings._--The method of depicting designs by bringing together morsels of variously colored materials is of high antiquity. We are apt to think of a line of distinction between classical and Christian mosaics in that the former were generally of marble and the latter mostly of colored and gilt glass. But glass mosaics were already in use in the Augustan age, and the use of gilt tesserae goes back to the 1st or 2nd century. The first application of glass to this purpose seems to have been made in Egypt, the great glass-working centre of antiquity, and the gilding of tesserae may with probability be traced to the same source, whence, it is generally agreed, most of the gilt glass vessels, of which so many have been found in the catacombs, were derived. The earliest existing mosaics of a typically Christian character are some to be found at Santa Costanza, Rome (4th century). Other mosaics on the vaults of the same church are of marble and follow a classical tradition. It is probable that we have here the meeting-point of two art-currents, the indigenous and the eastern. In Rome, the great apse-mosaic of S. Pudenziana dates from about A.D. 400. The mausoleum of Galla Placidia, Ravenna, is incrusted within by mosaic work of the 5th century, and most probably the dome mosaics of the church of St George, Salonica, are also of this period. Of the 6th century are many of the magnificent examples still remaining at Ravenna, portions of the original incrustation of St Sophia, Constantinople, those of the basilica at Parenzo, on the Gulf of Istria, and of St Catherines, Sinai. An interesting mosaic which is probably of this period, and has only recently been described, is at the small church of Keti in Cyprus. This, which may be the only Byzantine mosaic in the British dominions, fills the conch of a tiny apse, but is none the less of great dignity. In the centre is a figure of the Virgin with the Holy Child in her arms standing between two angels who hold disks marked with the sign [CHI]. They are named Michael and Gabriel. Another mosaic of this period brought from Ravenna to Germany two generations ago has been recently almost rediscovered, and set up in the new Museum of Decorative Art in Berlin. In this, a somewhat similar composition fills the conch of the apse, but here it is the Risen Christ who stands between the two archangels. Above, in a broad strip, a frieze of angels blowing trumpets stand on the celestial sea on either hand of the Enthroned Majesty. Entry: BYZANTINE
The cathedral of Como is also a transitional example, where buttresses are employed all round the church, and it is only in the finials which surmount them, the great projecting cornice which crowns the structure, and the doorways and windows, that we find classical details; the doorways recall the porches of the Lombard churches, and are of great beauty in design, the south doorway being said to be by Bramante. Another example, remarkable for its elaborately carved front and porch, is the church of Santa Maria dei Miracoli at Brescia (1487-1490) by Ludovici Beretta, which both externally and internally is one of the richest specimens of the early Italian Renaissance. The church dedicated to Santa Maria dei Miracoli in Venice (1481-1489), by Pietro Lombardo, is another transitional example in which the Byzantine influence of St Mark's is recognizable in the semicircular pediments of its façade and of the exterior of the chancel, and Lombardic influence in its external decorations with pilaster strips and blind arcades. The interior is one of the gems of the Renaissance, on account of its splendid decoration with marble linings and fine cinque-cento carving. Similar semicircular pediments are found in the façade of the church of San Zaccharia at Venice (1515), but are purely decorative because the roof behind is not semicircular like that of the Miracoli. The decoration of the main front, here all in marble, is of an entirely different design, and is subdivided into a series of storeys, the lower panelled, the first storey with arcades and the upper ones with pilasters. An earlier example (1461) in San Bernardino at Perugia is of a far higher standard, and its enrichment with bas-reliefs by the Florentine sculptor Agostino di Duccio (c. 1418-c. 1490) gives it the first place for its conception and execution. Among others, the church of Spirito Santo, Bologna, in terra cotta; the church of Santa Giustina, Padua (1532); the sacristy of San Satiro, Milan (1479), by Bramante; and the sacristy of the church of Santo Spirito, Florence (1489-1496), by Sangallo, are all interesting examples of the early Renaissance in Italy. Entry: RENAISSANCE