Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us
Anything different is good.
Sometimes when I'm talking, my words can't keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we speak. Probably so we can think twice.
If this bill passes, it is my deliberate opinion that it is virtually a dissolution of the Union; that it will free the States from their moral obligation; and, as it will be the right of all, so it will be the duty of some, definitely to prepare for a separation,--amicably if they can, violently if they must.[505-2]
Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.
No solemn sanctimonious face I pull, Nor think I 'm pious when I 'm only bilious; Nor study in my sanctum supercilious, To frame a Sabbath Bill or forge a Bull.
Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping -- they called it opportunity.
My years are not advancing as fast as you might think.
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.
You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!! ― Bill Watterson
If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.
"Lead us in a few words of silent prayer."
The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love, instead, see all of us as one.
You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don't help.
The very purpose of a Bill of Rights was to withdraw certain subjects from the vicissitudes of political controversy, to place them beyond the reach of majorities and officials and to establish them as legal principles to be applied by the courts. One’s right to life, liberty, and property, to free speech, a free press, freedom of worship and assembly, and other fundamental rights may not be submitted to vote; they depend on the outcome of no elections. [U.S. Supreme Court, W. Va. State Board of Education v. Barnette, 1943.]
Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.
Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure
Most people overestimate what they can do in one year and underestimate what they can do in ten years.
The past is a ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is now.
There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.
Technology is just a tool. In terms of getting the kids working together and motivating them, the teacher is the most important.
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
Patience is a key element of success.
It's fine to celebrate success, but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure.
Artificial Intelligence: the art of making computers that behave like the ones in movies. ― Bill Bulko
I try to make everyone's day a little more surreal.
But Titus said, with his uncommon sense, When the Exclusion Bill was in suspense: "I hear a lion in the lobby roar; Say, Mr. Speaker, shall we shut the door And keep him there, or shall we let him in To try if we can turn him out again?"
I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.
I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.
Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.
A strong nor'-wester 's blowing, Bill! Hark! don't ye hear it roar now? Lord help 'em, how I pities them Unhappy folks on shore now!
"Be *excellent* to each other."
If parliament were to consider the sporting with reputation of as much importance as sporting on manors, and pass an act for the preservation of fame as well as game, there are many would thank them for the bill.--_Sheridan._
640K ought to be enough for anybody.
As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others.
You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
Your most unhappy customers are your greatest source of learning.
"I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon."
When you introduce competition into the public school system, most studies show that schools start to do better when they are competing for students.
Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy.
All Children Have Brain Damage!
I failed in some subjects in exam, but my friend passed in all. Now he is an engineer in Microsoft and I am the owner of Microsoft.
Blandishments will not fascinate us, nor will threats of a "halter" intimidate. For, under God, we are determined that wheresoever, whensoever, or howsoever we shall be called to make our exit, we will die free men.
Vol. i. p. 516. Also in the Discussion on the Traitorous Correspondence Bill, 1793._ Illustrious predecessor.
Je schoner die Wirthin, je schwerer die Zeche=--The fairer the hostess the heavier the bill.
In china when you're one in a million, there are 1300 people just like you.
Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. Bill Cosby
A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.
If you're a leader, you don't push wet spaghetti, you pull it. The U.S. Army still has to learn that. The British understand it. Patton understood it. I always admired Patton. Oh, sure, the stupid bastard was crazy. He was insane. He thought he was living in the Dark Ages. Soldiers were peasants to him. I didn't like that attitude, but I certainly respected his theories and the techniques he used to get his men out of their foxholes.
I studied every thing but never topped.... But today the toppers of the best universities are my employees.
The computer was born to solve problems that did not exist before.
… No one is less happy than I am with the performance of Microsoft stock! I've lost tens of billions of dollars this year -- if you check, you'll see that's more than most people make in a lifetime!
A word to the wise ain’t necessary, It’s the stupid ones who need advice.
If you can’t make it good, at least make it look good.
A grandchild is God's reward for raising a child.
People always fear change. People feared electricity when it was invented, didn't they? People feared coal, they feared gas-powered engines. There will always be ignorance, and ignorance leads to fear. But with time, people will come to accept their silicon masters.
Our Bill of Rights, the most precious part of our legal heritage, is under subtle and pervasive attacks…In the struggle between our world and Communism, the temptation to imitate totalitarian security methods must be resisted day by day…When the rights of any individual or group are chipped away, the freedom of all erodes. [ Fortune , November, 1955.]
Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.
It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.
I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.
No person shall…be deprived of life, liberty or property, without due process of law; nor shall property be taken for public use, without just compensation. [Article V, December 15, 1791.]
Necessity is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
I have considered the pension list of the republic a roll of honor.
Every Closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.
Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose.
No person shall…be deprived of life, liberty or property, without due process of law; nor shall property be taken for public use, without just compensation. [Article V, December 15, 1791.]
It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy... Let's go exploring!
The poorest man may in his cottage bid defiance to all the force of the Crown. It may be frail; its roof may shake; the wind may blow through it; the storms may enter, the rain may enter,--but the King of England cannot enter; all his forces dare not cross the threshold of the ruined tenement!
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
The Internet is becoming the town square for the global village of tomorrow.
I'll worry about what people think and say when I look in my bill box and see someone else's name.
If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up.
No lie you can speak or act, but it will come, after longer or shorter circulation, like a bill drawn on Nature's reality, and be presented there for payment, with the answer: "No effects."
A worm is in the bud of youth, And at the root of age.
I'm not playing by their rules anymore!
Reality continues to ruin my life.
You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who've never had any.
Well, it's Groundhog Day... again...
When you become senile, you won't know it.
People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.
I think it's fair to say that personal computers have become the most empowering tool we've ever created. They're tools of communication, they're tools of creativity, and they can be shaped by their user.
If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.
For a long time it puzzled me how something so expensive, so leading edge, could be so useless. And then it occured to me that a computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things. They are, in short, a perfect match.
There is a certain nobility and dignity in combat soldiers and medical aid men with dirt in their ears. They are rough and their language gets coarse because they live a life stripped of convention and niceties. Their nobility and dignity come from the way they live unselfishly and risk their lives to help each other.
Intellectual property has the shelf life of a banana.
I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
If I'd had some set idea of a finish line, don't you think I would have crossed it years ago?
A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones who need advice.
(Professor of law emeritus at Loyola Law School in Los Angeles). Consider the Constitution. What we have here is a grim reminder that the liberties protected by the Bill of Rights are not neatly divisible into “property rights” and “personal liberties.” Even where the invasion is “only” of one’s property rights, it often implicates violation of other rights as well, even the right to life itself. Here is an object lesson that where one category of fundamental constitutional rights is not secure from governmental overreaching, neither are the others. All of which brings to mind the insight of the late U.S. Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart, who observed in 1972 that “the dichotomy between personal liberties and property rights is a false one. Property does not have rights. People have rights. In fact, a fundamental interdependence exists between the personal right to liberty and the personal right in property. Neither could have meaning without the other.” And if that is not enough, reflect on the fact that there are no societies in the world where a high degree of personal and political liberty does not correlate strongly with economic liberty. There may well be a moral in that too. [“Rule of Law,” The Wall Street Journal, August 25, 1993, p. A9.]
In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to disciplne a child is still a mystery to most fathers and...mothers. Only your grandmother and Genghis Khan know how to do it.
A consultant is a person who borrows your watch, tells you what time it
The first rule of any technology used in a business is that automation applied to an efficient operation will magnify the efficiency. The second is that automation applied to an inefficient operation will magnify the inefficiency.
Sigmund Freud once said, "What do women want?" The only thing I have learned in fifty-two years is that women want men to stop asking dumb questions like that.
Menu=--Bill of fare.
Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet.
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.
"I couldn't remember things until I took that Sam Carnegie course."
I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.
The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier.
Bullies — political bullies, economic bullies, and religious bullies — cannot be appeased; they have to be opposed with courage, clarity, and conviction. This is never easy. These true believers don't fight fair. Robert's Rules of Order is not one of their holy texts.
No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.
Wilt thou seal up the avenues of ill? Pay every debt, as if God wrote the bill?
Well private money can take risks in a way that government money often isn't willing to.
Concerning the war in Vietnam, Senator George Aiken of Vermount noted in January, 1966, "I'm not very keen for doves or hawks. I think we need more owls." -- Bill Adler, "The Washington Wits"
"We invented a new protocol and called it Kermit, after Kermit the Frog, star of "The Muppet Show." [3] [3] Why? Mostly because there was a Muppets calendar on the wall when we were trying to think of a name, and Kermit is a pleasant, unassuming sort of character. But since we weren't sure whether it was OK to name our protocol after this popular television and movie star, we pretended that KERMIT was an acronym; unfortunately, we could never find a good set of words to go with the letters, as readers of some of our early source code can attest. Later, while looking through a name book for his forthcoming baby, Bill Catchings noticed that "Kermit" was a Celtic word for "free", which is what all Kermit programs should be, and words to this effect replaced the strained acronyms in our source code (Bill's baby turned out to be a girl, so he had to name her Becky instead). When BYTE Magazine was preparing our 1984 Kermit article for publication, they suggested we contact Henson Associates Inc. for permission to say that we did indeed name the protocol after Kermit the Frog. Permission was kindly granted, and now the real story can be told. I resisted the temptation, however, to call the present work "Kermit the Book." -- Frank da Cruz, "Kermit - A File Transfer Protocol"
The Minnesota Board of Education voted to consider requiring all students to do some "volunteer work" as a prerequisite to high school graduation. Senator Orrin Hatch said that "capital punishment is our society's recognition of the sanctity of human life." According to the tax bill signed by President Reagan on December 22, 1987, Don Tyson and his sister-in-law Barbara run a "family farm." Their "farm" has 25,000 employees and grosses $1.7 billion a year. But as a "family farm" they get tax breaks that save them $135 million a year. Scott L. Pickard, spokesperson for the Massachusetts Department of Public Works, calls them "ground-mounted confirmatory route markers." You probably call them road signs, but then you don't work in a government agency. It's not "elderly" or "senior citizens" anymore. Now it's "chrono- logically experienced citizens." According to the FAA, the propeller blade didn't break off, it was just a case of "uncontained blade liberation." -- Quarterly Review of Doublespeak (NCTE)
"What are we going to do tonight, Bill?" "Same thing we do every night Steve, try to take over the world!"
Do something unusual today. Pay a bill.
The problem ... is that we have run out of dinosaurs to form oil with. Scientists working for the Department of Energy have tried to form oil using other animals; they've piled thousands of tons of sand and Middle Eastern countries on top of cows, raccoons, haddock, laboratory rats, etc., but so far all they have managed to do is run up an enormous bulldozer-rental bill</p> and anger a lot of Middle Eastern persons. None of the animals turned into oil, although most of the laboratory rats developed cancer. -- Dave Barry, "Postpetroleum Guzzler"
If for every rule there is an exception, then we have established that there is an exception to every rule. If we accept "For every rule there is an exception" as a rule, then we must concede that there may not be an exception after all, since the rule states that there is always the possibility of exception, and if we follow it to its logical end we must agree that there can be an exception to the rule that for every rule there is an exception. -- Bill Boquist
I may have invented it, but Bill made it famous -- David Bradley, inventor of the Ctrl-Alt-Delete keystroke, during panel discussion with Bill Gates at the 20-year celebration for the IBM PC.
The Army needs leaders the way a foot needs a big toe. -- Bill Murray
The only promotion rules I can think of are that a sense of shame is to be avoided at all costs and there is never any reason for a hustler to be less cunning than more virtuous men. Oh yes ... whenever you think you've got something really great, add ten per cent more. -- Bill Veeck
And if California slides into the ocean, Like the mystics and statistics say it will. I predict this motel will be standing, Until I've paid my bill. -- Warren Zevon, "Desperados Under the Eaves"
I just need enough to tide me over until I need more. -- Bill Hoest
Two brothers, Mort and Bill, like to sail. While Bill has a great deal of experience, he certainly isn't the rigger Mort is.
When you said "HEAVILY FORESTED" it reminded me of an overdue CLEANING
and HAD to murder the ONLY MAN who KNEW!!
Canada Bill Jones's Motto: It's morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money. Canada Bill Jones's Supplement: A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.
Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them. -- Bill Vaughn
Perhaps the RBLing (Realtime Black Hole) of msn.com recently, which prevented a large amount of mail going out for about 4 days, has had a positive influence in Redmond. They did agree to work on their anti-relay capabilities at their POPs to get the RBL lifted. -- Bill Campbell on Smail3-users
I try not to break the rules but merely to test their elasticity. -- Bill Veeck
Somewhat alarmed at the continued growth of the number of employees on the Department of Agriculture payroll in 1962, Michigan Republican Robert Griffin proposed an amendment to the farm bill so that "the total number of employees in the Department of Agriculture at no time exceeds the number of farmers in America." -- Bill Adler, "The Washington Wits"
"I couldn't remember things until I took that Sam Carnegie course." -- Bill Peterson, former Houston Oiler football coach
Two golfers were being held up as the twosome of women in front of them whiffed shots, hunted for lost balls and stood over putts for what seemed like hours. "I'll ask if we can play through," Bill said as he strode toward the women. Twenty yards from the green, however, he turned on his heel and went back to where his companion was waiting. "Can't do it," he explained, sheepishly. "One of them's my wife and the other's my mistress!" "I'll ask," said Jim. He started off, only to turn and come back before reaching the green. "What's wrong?" Bill asked. "Small world, isn't it?"
`Lasu' Releases SAG 0.3 -- Freeware Book Takes Paves For New World Order by staff writers Helsinki, Finland, August 6, 1995 -- In a surprise movement, Lars ``Lasu'' Wirzenius today released the 0.3 edition of the ``Linux System Administrators' Guide''. Already an industry non-classic, the new version sports such overwhelming features as an overview of a Linux system, a completely new climbing session in a tree, and a list of acknowledgements in the introduction. The SAG, as the book is affectionately called, is one of the corner stones of the Linux Documentation Project. ``We at the LDP feel that we wouldn't be able to produce anything at all, that all our work would be futile, if it weren't for the SAG,'' says Matt Welsh, director of LDP, Inc. The new version is still distributed freely, now even with a copyright that allows modification. ``More dough,'' explains the author. Despite insistent rumors about blatant commercialization, the SAG will probably remain free. ``Even more dough,'' promises the author. The author refuses to comment on Windows NT and Windows 96 versions, claiming not to understand what the question is about. Industry gossip, however, tells that Bill Gates, co-founder and CEO of Microsoft, producer of the Windows series of video games, has visited Helsinki several times this year. Despite of this, Linus Torvalds, author of the word processor Linux with which the SAG was written, is not worried. ``We'll have world domination real soon now, anyway,'' he explains, ``for 1.4 at the lastest.'' ... -- Lars Wirzenius <wirzeniu@cs.helsinki.fi> [comp.os.linux.announce]